Well Done

It's moment like this where I simply wish that life was not cruel and that it can give good people a second chance.

I would have to say I'm more in denial than anything right now because I still cannot believe at how fast everything happened. Learned about the news last month. Received a message at the beginning of the week. Got a phone call early this morning.

I shouldn't have taken the situation for granted. I should have taken minutes of my precious time to go see him and let him know that I was there. I should have been there to properly say goodbye and accept the upcoming grief. Even though I know my uncle is in a good place right now, I simply wish I could have spent more time with him while he was still here.

RIP pa um. I'm sorry and I miss you.

"For the benefit of all sentient beings which surpasses even the wishful-filling gem
May I hold them dear at all times." - Buddhist text

One Day

Undoubtedly one of the most intense books I’ve read in a while. I was expecting a heartfelt love story, and while I got that, I also got so much more: heartbreak, anxiety, familiarity, sadness, happiness, madness...and so many other things that I just couldn’t put it down, and when I did, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Even when I finished it, it ended on such a note that I carried the book with me for weeks just to go over my favourite parts whenever I wanted.

It left me with a knot in my stomach more than once, and there were times I just wanted to pull a "Joey Tribbiani" and put the book to rest in the freezer - to give me time to think and absorb what had just happened. I can’t imagine anyone reading this and not feeling like they know Emma Morley and Dexter Mayhew. At a certain point near the end I had to put it down and take a breath and leave it there for a couple of hours because I was so mad - and also because I wanted to not know the end for a little while (like I did with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I only read the Epilogue twelve hours after I had read the end because I wanted to drag it out for as long as I could).

After a while into the book you stop wishing for the end to come, when you will see the outcome of all the complications of the connections linking these two souls, and start hoping to see more of their friendship and how they are never on the same track but are always there for each other regardless, how their minds are so different but they can put ideas and controversies aside for the sake of their relationship (well, most of the time anyway). I was surprised by how real they felt to me and how they reminded me so much of myself. I feel like David Nicholls have written down my very own story and my future in this book. I'm not going to lie, I was scared. I may not be in the best state of mind with all the conflicting feelings that i have right now, but when I believe that my life, in some odd way, will turn exactly like in the book my gut feeling had never failed to prove me wrong.

There’s a quote from Tony Parsons, author of Man and Boy, on the back of the book that says, “The best weird love story since The Time Traveler’s Wife.” While I don’t think Emma and Dex’s story is as weird as Clare and Henry’s, I definitely agree that it is just as remarkable. I have made this book my bible for life.

----

And yes, for all you non-bookworm people the movie just came out in theater. Saw it. Did not hate it. Jim Sturgess was toohotforwords. I cried for a good 5 min because seeing the scenes on screen brought back so many memories. It highlighted major events from the book but I still strongly recommend that you should get a copy yourself and read. Hollywood always end up butchering novels anyway.

Blended Colours

"To You:

If you cannot piece together broken glass, why did you try to when he left? If you cannot continue to draw with a broken crayon, why did you try to when she left? If you had sworn your loyalty to me, why did you go and hold hands with the Devil? If you had sworn your heart to me, why did you eat from that box of chocolate? If you had sworn yourself to me, then why did you kiss that soul?

Now, I am picking up the shattered glass that had ravaged the floor. Now, I am trying to murder a blank piece of paper with the broken crayon. Now, I am reaching out for Devil to end my misery. Now, I am purging up all that chocolate I had eaten after you left.

But, I have no soul to kiss.

Because you took mine.

It is neither a fond or hated memory. Yet, on the good days, I don't remember. And on bad days, I do. I remember all of it in its entirety tightly pinned behind a picture frame permanently nailed to the walls of my mind. I should erase the pieces, but I choose to let it live inside because I will be able to play, replay, and pause those moments at my will."

I don't normally read the same book/stories twice but Solangel's classics on Soompi will always be one of those undying stories that I would read over and over again and still feel like it was the first time. Re-reading CBU and BP has a new different meaning to me now. It hits home.

Five Things: Reunion

[New 5inch beauties]

I think I managed to find a relatively good balance between work and fun this week. I got to spend another great weekend with my girlfriends; sunbathing in the Old Port, eating out in the village and chit-chatting over a good bottle of Sauvignon. Knowing that we won’t be able to see each other as often as soon as the semester starts (mind you in a few weeks), we all tried to enjoy each other’s company while we can. As for the redecoration going on at home, my parents are going through the color picking process for the rooms in the house. I just cannot wait till it’s all over and to finally see some results after hearing them bickering about it for the past month. I have another great weekend in store for me. It’s still summer afterall… :)

[Favorite shisha lounge/café in the city]

[Weird English at the asian grocery store; Favor Swallow?]

[Blueberry Boy Bait in the making]

[Very special package from Japan]

Chloé Fragrance Campaign 2011

Parisian fashion house Chloé will release their new ad campaign this coming fall for their signature fragrance Chloé. The campaign stars none other than Imogen Poots and Camille Rowe Pourcheresse who are by the way drop dead beautiful. The ad itself is nothing special or extravagant but that is what I love about Chloé. They always find a way to create something so simple, modest and beautiful that everything just seem effortless. I wonder if I can find that large bottle of perfume somewhere. I'll add it to my collection :)

자신에게도 축복받지 못한

I'm falling in love with Alex Chu all over again. His new album is simply wonderful...

He'll Complete Me

It's not like I won't find someone new, you know.

We both know it's not exactly a question about lack of choice. It's only a matter of time before I stumble across that person who will somehow make my world magic again. Just by looking at me he'll put a hundred different feelings in my body and my head will go completely blank when he smiles. My heart will skip a beat from the slightest sound of my phone, and everything I do when he's not around will be colored by his absence.

I will meet someone who doesn't have that need of playing games and instead of following all kinds of rules, simply follows his heart. Someone who makes me wanna look past all the times I've been hurt and feel like it's actually worth risking everything again. Someone who makes me wanna fight my fears of opening up so I can let him in, because the thought of him not knowing me completely is far worse than my fear of rejection.

He will sigh at my stupid jokes and the way I tend to forget stuff and mess everything up, but deep down he'll love it because love's not about accepting each others flaws, it's about loving them because they make us who we are. I will find somebody for whom I am prepared to show not just the strong, independent side of me that the rest of the world know, but also the insecurities that make me wake up in the middle in the night crying because I'm sick of hurting.

He will not give me my confidence back or make me love myself again. I have no need for a fairytale prince who lifts me up on his white horse and saves me. He will make me complete though, in a way no one has ever done before, and together we will get struck by love so hard that nothing will ever be the same again. You see, I know he's out there and I won't stop until I find him. Cause I deserve nothing less than to love someone who loves me back and this I know. So there's really no need for you to worry. He could be right around the corner when I walk out this door today.

The thing is, deep down with all my heart and with all i have, I want him to be you.

Five Things: Renew

[Amazing night out with the bff at Moomba]

This week was all about starting fresh. My parents are under the hype of redecorating the entire house thus dragging my poor soul to every furniture/decorating stores there is in the city. Knowing how they have picked the wrong person to go shopping with, we all end up agreeing on most of the furniture that we got. It was not easy though. In exchange of putting aside my expensive taste, my mother have (reluctantly) agreed to redecorate my entire bedroom (muahaha). It was an offer i could not say no to. Aside from all the decorating madness going on, my week was positively packed ever since i got back from vacay. Got to spend quality times with my amazing friends as well as enjoying the great weather in the city. My only complaint is the lack of sleep I've been getting due to nighttime being the only time of the day where brain actually goes through a process of deep thinking. But whatever. I’m really I looking forward to a much-needed restful weekend. My first weekend off from work in the longest time!

[White porcelain plateau for my perfume collection + new YSL La Parisienne]

[Mini bouquet arrangement of daisies and carnations]

[Homemade Ice latte - Watch'out Starbuck!]

[Waking up to her every morning]

Ai Mei

"I cannot bear the fact that we can't write out a happy ending."